For background on this post, read my thoughts on relationship deja vu--romantic edition.
I've been talking to this cute boy (maybe I should grow up and call him a handsome or attractive man, which he is) for a couple weeks now. We seem to click pretty well, and I'm having such a good time getting to know him. This little flirtation has been so different from any other. I'm so calm and clear headed about it, at least that's how it seems to me. Knowing that a male has any sort of interest in me at all usually causes me a certain level of anxiety, and I tend to end up thinking that I'm totally crazy and/or hopeless. Not this time! I don't feel panicky at all. I'm having fun. I'm being so confident and direct. It's not a show either. I really feel that way, and it feels great.
I was talking to Kim about it the other day, wondering when I got to be so confident in myself. I was telling her some of the things that I had said to this oh-so-wonderful man, shocked that I had the guts to say them. Kim's take on the issue was that he must bring it out in me, and she also mentioned that Kyle brings out good things in her. Oh! Is that what that's like? I like it!
I don't know what's going to happen. He still has a girlfriend and I'm still moving to California. I don't know what will happen, but I know that I'm really enjoying this. I've found a new me, and I like me.
5 comments:
It's ok, you can call me cute if you want to. I'm cool with that. :-)
You know, I always seem to get into a relationship just before moving. It has happened at least three times. Even last October I was kidding Bishop Larsen that if I really wanted to get into a relationship, I would just have to make plans to move away. Turns out that November I got into a relationship, and January I moved away.
I can't quite decide if I just have horrible fate, or if there is something about knowing that I'm moving away that lets me escape the dating anxiety and go exploring relationship possibilities. Perhaps internally, I know I'm moving away and so the whole commitment thing is no longer an inhibitor from getting into a relationship because I know I have an easy way out (moving).
If that makes sense.
That makes tons of sense. Thanks for sharing. You're a good friend.
Yeah! I did not know you had a blog!! Thanks for posting a comment on mine so that I could find yours. I am super excited to have you back in So Cal. We will definitely get together and you can come to the California Edition of Family get togethers (which don't happen as much as I would like). It's been fun to reaad your posts. So insightful and personal. I'm impressed because mine is just mostly about Sam...which, let's face it...she IS my life right now. And, I will just say that relationships, whatever the outcome, are totally worth the sweat, tears, and laughs. I know that if I had not had the relationships I did before meeting Jason I would not have learned many important things I NEEDED to learn. Like I tell Jason, he is everything I never knew I needed. Just be ready...I hear there are lots of cute/handome boys/men here in Cali!!!!
hmmm... I'm gonna go ahead and say you don't need no cute Cali boys, you just need to get this cute Utah boy to move to Cali! ;) Sounds like he's a keeper in any event. I'll bet he's even got a cool family... You should definitely keep him in mind!
I LOVE reading this backwards and knowing what's already happened!!! I love Blake's comment as well!!! So cute!
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