We had some crazy challenges and changes this year and kept saying that if we could make it through all this in the first year, we'd be set for life. We moved to a different state, sold our condo in a down market, changed jobs, re-started graduate school, and lived apart for almost 3 months.
In this first year, I heard several people say something to the effect of "Don't worry, the newness will wear off. You'll get used to each other after a year. My husband and I don't even hold hands anymore" or "The first year of marriage is the hardest. You'll fight a lot." Don't worry? Don't worry, I wasn't. I'm not quite sure what these people were hoping to accomplish with their comments, but I think they probably failed.
First off, we're enjoying being together. The newness is fun and exciting. Why you gotta be a wet blanket and prophesy it's ending? As if we would wake up today, on our first anniversary, and suddenly be bored by one another.
Nextly, we are both affectionate people. It's one of the things that makes us a good match for each other. I don't see that suddenly changing either.
C, if it's true that all couples fight a lot in the first year, we're going to have a VERY peaceful existence. We're just not fighters. We don't yell, exchange insults and accusations, or anything of the sort. We don't fight, but we do pout (see previous post). Maybe we'll look back later and see this year as the poutiest year of our marriage.
Finally, in the course of my studies, I have learned that the first year is not really the year to worry about. I'll have to be careful during years 5-8, 15-18, and 25-28 as these are the times most couples divorce, statistically speaking.
In summary, we are still so happy to be together. We made it through the first year with flying colors and hope to never have a year that crazy again. (Knock on wood. Quick! Everyone! Knock on wood!)
So, on the first of many to come, I wish a Happy Anniversary to my best friend!
5 comments:
Mmmm I'm so with you. I don't know why SO MANY PEOPLE talk about marriage like its a cage fight, like you're lucky to survive it at all! So annoying. Trev & I got tons of bad advice about marriage before we were married, and since have decided not to give any marriage advice to anyone else except for something like: "Marriage is really great, and so is sex!" Because we would have laughed and enjoyed that advice :)
Congratulations!
Happy Anniversary Sweetheart!
I think I emailed this to you instead of commenting on it.
I'm looking forward to an eternity of good times with you!
Blake
Congrats!! Well I am happy to hear you guys are so happy together. I think it is so wonderful that you guys aren't fighters, I am not either (or so I thought) but I cannot say the same about us. That would be nice though. Interesting statistic about what years divorces are more likely to happen. Why is that? Any particular reasoning? I will be sure to watch out for those. Well I am glad you made it through a most eventful year! Your Thanksgiving feast sounded very scrumptious.
Congrats Becca. So glad to hear things are going well for you guys!
Congratulations!!! ***:D*** I think it's funny that people think the 1st year is 'hardest'... I sure didn't fit that to be true either! I'm glad to hear that you and Blake are still madly in love. I hope you live happily ever after forever and always! :) Love ya!
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